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Personal Round Two!

Posted: Wed Jul 24, 2013 4:13 am
by seedy
Let's hear about your family folks!
Who's your significant other if etc.

I know I've shared my part a little here before. Married for 1.5 years and have a 2.5 year old that might just be the coolest kid to walk the earth :mrgreen:
My last name would be dead if I didn't create a man in this world so my life's mission is somewhat complete!
I hope to have two more kids (another boy and a girl) but I'm having a hard time convincing the woman right now. Money is tight and the little guy trashes her patience and stress levels like every day lol.

one of these days another "accident" will happen though. our motto is (and has been for like 4 years) that we're not NOT trying :P

before this life, i lived with this chick at my house for 10 f'n years and then we broke up
frankly she lost her marbles and so after trying for a long time to get her help and her refusing....i had to end it.
god knows what her story is today it's actually scary and sad for me to think about.

crazy all those years invested but i guess that's how life works n such and it all worked out as i crossed paths with my woman at the right time and she's helped me to live the dream so to speak.

I have to believe there's at least ONE more parent here and I know some of yall have spoken about your ball n chains.....let's hear it! :D

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Wed Jul 24, 2013 4:15 am
by seedy
oh to be clear -
the "10 years" chick is not my wife. 2 different peeps i'm talking about there.

reading that back it might be confusing to some if not all ;)

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Wed Jul 24, 2013 9:40 am
by Ross
Been with my girlfriend for nearly four years now, although it's closer to five if you include the first on-and-off year. We're engaged, but marriage plans are only really tentative - the engagement is more of a sign of commitment to each other than anything.

No kids planned - conservation is something we're both massively passionate about, so having no kids is our way of trying to counterbalance people who have more than two. Overpopulation is an oft overlooked issue.
Plus we both fucking hate kids. :P

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Wed Jul 24, 2013 7:41 pm
by seedy
ha! i can't possibly be more the opposite!

i feel like being a dad has been my calling ever since i can remember
literally dreamed about producing a son and being a dad my whole life

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Thu Jul 25, 2013 9:02 am
by Pandemonium
What's with the personal stuff seedy :) how many rounds are planned :D ?

OK, here we go, shot info because I'm lazy right now :)

I'm with my woman for 10 years,
got engaged in March,
planning the wedding for November 9th,

in the meantime - conceived a child in the very first try :) two-point-five months ago...
the kid will be born in January :)

Being a father is something I look forward to, still a little confused though :)
I wouldn't say it's the most important thing in life, but probably top5,
I really think overpopulation is/will be a problem really soon,
but fuck it, if some no-brain asshole can have 6+ kids,
I can have one or two, because I really like kids and I think I'll be a very good guide in a kid's life :)

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Thu Jul 25, 2013 3:35 pm
by seedy
haha no idea how many rounds

i just see this place and some of yall i've been speaking to for god knows how many years now and just realize how little i know about most of you other than a love for similar music!
no doubt i would open my doors to most of you if you were to visit my country and state so i figure knowing a little more wouldn't hurt too ;)

wow ten years man!
i did my ten but i think i stalled on moving forward because we first got together so young.
really i probably would have been nearing the marriage stage etc. in the later years but then that was also the time she started getting mental so.......the timing of it all. in the end it was truly GOOD luck that i waited so long and our demise was clear before it was "too late" with a kid n such.

dang and here you have a little spud coming along and i don't think you've announced it yet until now!?
keep us posted man or at least me because i'm so interested.
haha just think about the world of music your little one will grow up to.
that alone is just so awesome to dream about

CONGRATS!!!!!!! :) :) :)

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Thu Jul 25, 2013 7:46 pm
by Pandemonium
Thanks seedy :)
I'm sure he will be properly musically educated :)

My mistake, I got engaged when we were celebrating 9 years together, not 10 :)
after all that time you lose count :)

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Thu Jul 25, 2013 10:51 pm
by RazorJack
Nice to see there's a whole new generation of FSOL fans on the way! Ross, I hope you and your girlfriend will your change your mind...

I'd love to have kids some day, but not yet, my goal is to have at least one before I'm 30 so I've still got a few years to chill out. No significant other at the moment (anymore).

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Thu Jul 25, 2013 11:23 pm
by Ross
RazorJack wrote:Ross, I hope you and your girlfriend will your change your mind...
It's also comments like this that make us want to not have kids - we've been told by so many people that we should have them etc. - as if one way is correct and one isn't. We're taking what we think is a responsible decision and often get criticised for it.

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Fri Jul 26, 2013 3:23 pm
by seedy
ross i don't think you should take it as criticism at all.
rather it's people either wanting to see what type of offspring you two would produce but more likely it's other parents just wanting to share the joy with you in this unique way.

it's a hard feeling to verbalize and it's surely one i experienced before i had my kid. and now i'm on the other side of the coin hoping my best friends have kids sooner than later :P

it's just a case of entering a new chapter in that is really crazy and insanely rewarding at the same time....and just wanting your friends to come along for the ride. share the experience etc.

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Fri Jul 26, 2013 3:26 pm
by seedy
also add:

just the idea that people might think you "don't know what you're missing"

and there surely could be some truth to that depending on the person. someone who doesn't want may think it's not worth the hassle etc.......and just don't have a real concept of the rewards

for some people the transition is SO drastic. based on what I've told yall you can see that i've had a somewhat parental view of the world my whole i think the transition for me wasn't too big.
for others though their entire world is seen in a new light.....and i think some peeps are just saying "dude this is have NO idea (because i didn't)"

so yeah.....get to work and make some babies now!

hehe j/k ;)

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Fri Jul 26, 2013 4:24 pm
by Ross
Ah I've just had so many people seem to think we're wrong/mistaken for not wanting kids. I think there's such a huge amount of responsibility in having children - i.e. can you be responsible parents, bring up the children in a way that hugely benefits them. I genuinely don't foresee a time when Lucy and I will have the health, time and money to have children and bring them up properly. This coupled with the fact that we both think there are too many people in the world as it is means it's not something we're likely to change our minds on.

Sorry for potential overreaction, it's just something we've thought long and hard about, and yet we keep getting met with flippant responses like "you should give it a try!". Society expects people to have lots of kids, almost as a lifestyle choice these days, and so few people think about what they're doing, or just have them for selfish reasons (i.e. it makes me happy!), and it's annoying to have a responsible decision dismissed in the face of that.


Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Fri Jul 26, 2013 4:27 pm
by Ross
Also bearing in mind that I have Asperger's, I'm not sure I'd actually be able to give my kid any time. New FSOL album vs. kid's first day at school - FSOL would win, nobrainer. Ha.

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Fri Jul 26, 2013 9:06 pm
by Pandemonium
Kids aside (I don't know much about how it's connected with AS),
you really seem to cope with the AS just fine Ross.
I mean, as much as I can tell via this forum... and your music.

Are there degrees of AS? Do you have a mild case?

Re: Personal Round Two!

Posted: Fri Jul 26, 2013 10:07 pm
by Ross
Well, it's on the autism spectrum so it varies from case to case, obviously some people have it worse than others. I'm definitely what's called high functioning. I've also had various friends and "friends" in the past who've told me (in supportive ways and nasty ways) of how I'm doing things "wrong", so I've slowly learned to moderate my behaviour to suit different situations - I'm quite good at communication in public these days. There are also times when it makes my life intolerably hard, and it's almost entirely the cause of various bouts of depression and anxiety I've gone in and out of during my life. And good God, if you ever get me started on an FSOL conversation in real life, I could probably bore the shit out of even anyone here!

Hmm, talk about personal thread.