Congrats on the second one Seedy! my thoughts: I regret having waited until my late thirties to have kids. i thought my playtime would be over. It's true, your priorities do change, but it becomes the right thing to do somehow. I also thought I would love having kids but 'love' doesn't really cut it - it's much, much more than that.
Ross, I don't want to go all agony uncle on you, and even while I'm typing this I can see some replies below indicating that you are exercising extreme patience with all of us, but I've started now...but imo it's a shame that you and your girlfriend are denying a basic human impulse for what for in the most part appear to be political reasons. Overpopulation (even if there is such a thing - all economically developed nations across the globe have been experiencing a declining birthrate for decade after decade. Some, like New Zealand and Canada, have effectively bribed would be parents) is not your fault. there are so many factors at play. if you were that political it is capitalism that wreaks far more damage on the planet, on natural resources and human wellbeing than overpopulation, so why not devote your efforts into understanding that and have your family, instead of worrying about overpopulaton. You don't say what is is exactly about overpopulation that doesn't agree with you but if it's things like natural resources depletion then you may have fallen victim to a sleight of hand. It's the primary economic system of the world which drains the planet and humans of our resources. it relies on built in obsolescence as the primary driver. So for instance, the water needed to make the tyres for one car massively dwarfs the water needs of a village (
http://www.treehugger.com/clean-technol ... -make.html) So I am slightly skeptical about it as a problem, as it may have undertones of slightly dodgy ideologies such as colonialism, and capitalism. ie, the idea that other developing nations mustn't have their industrial/technological revolution boom as it would upset the cosy little apple cart we have up here and any effective competition would affect the ability to take their natural resources at rock bottom prices and sell it back to them as a refined product at a thousand times the price. Anyway, you didn't go into details so I can't be sure these are your reasons.
And overpopulation shouldn't necessarily be seen as a reason not to have kids because being parents is more than just littering the planet. it helps you grow as a person and brings out your nurturing and caring side which your community as a whole (and I mean virtual communities like this one too) benefit by. it also brings you two closer together and helps make sense of your relationship as you age, and your children will hopefully look after you as you grow older
also, and this comment isn't directed at you necessarily, don't let money or the lack of it put you off. kids products are a massive industry and it's amazing how little you actually need. friends and family are so amazingly generous when you have children and give you so much stuff. You can effectively ignore every book, magazine, baby club or piece of advice you are given as most of it is rubbish. stick to homemade and simple where you can. like, my brother in law told us about putting cooled peppermint tea into a pipette bottle and giving a few drops of that after every feed to prevent colic. fucking genius idea and our tot didn't suffer from colic at all, ever. works for teething too. all my family and friends were feeding their kids 'gripe water', and baby calpol and all sorts of nasty and expensive shit.
anyway, i'm only saying any of this because i selfishly want our great, great, FSOL chronicler to have a progeny who will continue your noble works, and maybe make a film about FSOL one day
To get back on track, our second one is on the way
my wife says this one feels very different to the first. i played my son loads of Cascade and Lifeforms when he was still inside and he HATES it when I play them now. I'll play The Isness to the new one and see what happens.
And Pande, congratulations too! We fully expect your child to learn the letters f, s, o and l first, ok?